CAN THIS MARRIAGE BE SAVED?

I’m a liberal Democrat, Mr. Wonderful is a conservative Republican. For most of our happily married life, nearly 20 years now, our political philosophies and votes have never caused an unpleasant issue or escalated into “the war between the Roses.” 

Every election day since our wedding, we’d leave the polls smiling and say, “I cancelled you out!”  Most mornings over the past decade, he’d join me in watching “Morning Joe.” Come evening, I’d sip my Kettle while we eyeballed Bret Baier’s “Special Report.” Balanced and fair, as it were.

Then….Donald rode down the escalator…. and we suffered through a longer, more contentious campaign than the Mongol conquests … then the surprising result on November 8. The next morning, one of us was smiling, the other wasn’t.

And now, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, we coexist in a demilitarized political zone where frequent and loud HARRUMPHS from him interrupt Chuck Todd’s interviews on “Meet the Press,” or “YOU CANNOT BELIEVE WHAT HE’S SAYING” explode from me if I happen to join him watching Fox’s “The Five.”

After breakfast I walk into the bedroom to make the bed, and discover FOX & FRIENDS on the Samsung. I quickly change the channel to MSNBC. Meanwhile, he’s in the kitchen sipping his Dunkin’, swiftly switching the tv from MSNBC to Fox. 

He gets in the Honda mini-van to go get a haircut, hears Andrea Mitchell on the radio, and immediately slides the dial to the Sirius XMPatriot station. I take off for Hannaford to food shop and channel-surf between NPR and POTUS.

Believe me: Mr. W is a smart man. I respect his opinions and beliefs. But why isn’t he seeing Trump the way I do? 

He tells me, “I like Trump’s agenda.  I feel very in tune with what he talks about, especially immigration.  He's not a bad person.  Plus he’s trying like hell. I don’t agree with everything he says but I do with a lot. We need a change.”

Me?  I’m not dumb. But as Mr. W asks, “Why are you so negative?”

I miss the dignity of Obama. I like Judge Gorsuch but not so much the Muslim ban or “Javanka’s” astounding ascendency.  Or the insane and endless tweets, his braggadocio manner, his stance on Planned Parenthood, his “alternative facts,” his fleeting loyalties. I mean, WHERE is KellyAnne Conway these days? Locked up in the Lincoln bedroom?

It’s been 100 days since the inauguration and the nation is as heatedly divided as we are. At dinner parties, the conversation eschews political discussions because the eight guests sitting around the table respectfully, but most ardently, disagree. I have a passionate daughter-in-law who can’t abide Trump and an equally fervent son-in-law who says, “Give him a chance.”  And some of my best friends…..think the same thing about me.

A recent USA TODAY poll about the Trump presidency posed the question:  “Do you think your life will be impacted positively or negatively by the Trump presidency?” The answer was 50-50. Sounds like our house.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt said, “When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.” Disco singer Gloria Gaynor released a gospel album in the ‘70s entitled “We Will Survive.” 

I plan to do both.