MY MOTHER'S HERMES SCARF

Several years before Mom died in 1995, I asked what she REALLY wanted for Mother’s Day. She adored gardening, so I figured she might like salmon-colored geraniums for her flower boxes or maybe even a new trowel. 

“I’ve always wanted an Hermes scarf,” she told me.

Hermes scarves — a wardrobe staple of Jackie Onassis, Audrey Hepburn, celebrities like Cate Blanchet, even royals. Queen Elizabeth wrapped an Hermes scarf around her brunette hairdo to fend off Scottish mist while walking her beloved Corgis at Balmoral Castle. Grace Kelly used her Hermes scarf as a sling after injuring her arm. Since 1937, these iconic imported-silk scarves, almost all produced in a factory near Lyon, France, have been a favorite of fashionistas… and my mother.

I lived outside New York City at the time and learned there was an Hermes store on Madison Avenue. So the week before Mother’s Day, I drove in and selected a scarf in lustrous reds, pale greens and yellows that dominated an intricate geometric floral design. She loved it! She also told me, “This scarf is yours when I can no longer wear it.”

I packed Mom’s scarf (it was 29 years old!) for my trip to Paris in April with daughter Alex and granddaughter Maddie, thinking I’d look tres francaise strolling the Champs-Elysees.  But on the flight over, I made another decision: to visit the Hermes flagship store near our hotel and buy one for myself.

Late on a Wednesday afternoon after bouncing around Paris aboard the open-air Hop-On-Hop-Off Big Red Bus, Alex, Maddie and I headed to Hermes. Dressed in jeans, puffer jackets and sneakers plus wind-blown hair, we were greeted cordially by the doorman who directed us through the soignee set to the scarf counter. Within minutes I had selected a pale and deep blue flowery scarf that we all agreed “looked great.” 

But that night back at the hotel, I studied the scarf, compared it to my mother’s, and thought, “This isn’t great. It’s not me and I don’t love it.” Back to Hermes the next morning.

When I explained to a different sales associate that I wasn’t happy with my purchase, she eyeballed me with a nuance of disdain. “Alors, let’s see the scarf.”  She opened the box, took one glance at me, looked back at the scarf, then said, “NON! NON! Mon dieu! This scarf is NOT you! We change.” 

Over the next half hour, she draped scarf after scarf around my neck. “Non, I don’t think so.” “Hmmm, this one — peut-être.” Then she showed me a sumptuous blue, green, yellow and tan scarf designed by Jonathan Burton, a filmmaker and writer whose award-winning 2012 film "Yes Mum" was the most highly watched and successful MAFMAD film in the competition's 11 year history. (Who knew?) 

I draped the silky sumptuousness around my neck, gazed at the mirror, and said, “This is it.”  “Voila! J’agree,” the sales associate said with a smile and a wink. She also gave me a tiny orange box filled with cards illustrating different ways to wear my new Hermes masterpiece. 

And later that day, I told daughter Alex that this Hermes scarf would be hers “when I can no longer wear it.” The tradition lives on.